Hypocrite

About 4 months ago my uncle taught me a lesson that did not really stick in my head, this lesson was about hypercritical people. He told me and my sister that we are hypocrites, and once I thought about that, he was right. I acted differently at school then I did at home and I definitely acted differently at church. So I thought to myself, what is so bad about being a hypocrite. I mean being a hypocrite just meant that you act a certain way with certain people,it means that you have multiple personalities. This week I finally comprehended the object of the lesson that he was trying to teach, okay that was a lie. I still can't comprehend how being a hypocrite is a bad thing, but in some form I think that being a hypocrite is not exactly what God intended you to be. Last night was when I actually started worrying, I decided that I wasn't going to be a hypocrite anymore and that I was going to just be me. When suddenly a scary thought came into my head, I don't know my own true personality. I have been living a lie for so long that I forgot the truth. I haven't been my weird wacky self since I started Junior High, because in Junior High you have to have a certain image. So, if I don't know what my own personality is, then how can I only be my personality and not keep changing it with different people. At this time in my life I am very uncertain of what to do next. I keep thinking, what was my personality before all of the bad stuff changed me, I am trying so hard to remember that it gives me a headache. So now for the moment I am in a dead end, until suddenly I retrace my steps and God sets me free.